On one side you have your perfect friend – your companion, your defender, your secret-keeper, your giver of laughter. And on the other hand, you envision your partner and a married life together. And now you are at the point of questioning, is it time to cross the bridge?
You might ask, do I risk our friendship for the chance to forever? Could I be the perfect partner for her as much as I am her perfect friend? Could we do this? Should I even start getting romantic?
This is the trouble of dating friends as well as marital affair. It has been the subject of too many movies. Think about “My Best Friend’s wedding” or the more recent “Maid of Honor”. Why the proliferation of the topic? Because it happens. It’s very easy to fall in love with your friends.
Why is this? Because any form of relationship is founded on friendship. In friendship, one genuinely cares for the other without sacrificing his or her individuality. In friendship, the bond is very mutual such that you meet halfway in all decisions – even the littlest ones. The trouble with most relationships is that they tend to engulf the lover in the life of the beloved, such that the lover loses what made him/her an individual in the first place. The beloved becomes the center of the lover’s life, and he forgets everything else. In as much as this sounds romantic, these kinds of fairytale situations do not make any relationship work. Love and relationships now have to accommodate the individuality of both the lover and the beloved.
Dating friends is nothing but a first step to further the commitment that both friends have made to each other. It stems from the realization that something better could happen between the two friends, and it’s worth taking the risk. The key to making friendships blossom into relationships is to manage expectations. Whatever you have been doing for each other while you were still friends would definitely have to continue, and then you agree on the other expectations that relationships require.
That’s why you date. You officially date. The agreement on the expectations is not a document of a list of things you will do for each other. It is something you negotiate on every time some contingency happens. It is something you work on. Do not be afraid. If you and your friend are on very good terms with each other, meaning you are very open in communicating and you find each other’s quirks lovable, then the adjustment in dating should not be a problem, much more if you are pursuing the dating into a relationship.
Of course it happens that when two people hang out with each other all the time, people always assume they are already dating. You would say, “But we’re just friends.” But this excuse does not work, really. It’s precisely when you are with someone you genuinely listen to, and who makes you feel uninhibited, there is something magical going on. The friendship is one step towards something truly magical.
So as you think about dating friends or someone very dear to you now, do not be afraid. It could happen. And it could work. Go cross the bridge, and start a new adventure – both for you and your beloved.
Cross with Regular Dating
Regular dating is the most popular type of dating. This is because most people like the intimacy of being alone with their significant other. It is going out with your date alone without other people coming along. Many people like to include dinner and something to do afterwards like the theatre, a concert, or dancing. Everyone has a different idea of what they believe is romantic. Dinner might be at a fine dining restaurant and the two of you will get dressed up. Some people consider a home cooked meal by candlelight dinner the romantic way to dine on a date. This can be the best way to go if you don’t have a lot of money to go out but you want to do something special. In addition, when you cook a meal for your date there is more thought and effort put into it and some people enjoy it much more than they do being treated to a fine restaurant.
The regular dating experience gives you the opportunity to get to know your date on a more personal level than when you are out with other people. You can spend the evening talking and enjoying each other. If you are not comfortable with an intimate dating experience on the first date then you might not want to go alone on the first date. You might consider a double or a group date. It gives you the opportunity to get to know your date on a personal level. Usually, a regular date will consist of lunch or dinner together and finding something to do afterwards. Regular dating is the preferred method of dating for most people because of the attention and the intimacy at sex dating site.
